If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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