dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Come on in and take your pants off
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