I bet he comes in French.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
