Plan B is the new Plan A
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
