I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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