forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize