Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
