wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize