This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
