we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I just gift wrapped bread.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
