I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize