using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
