Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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