the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
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