so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
