We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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