Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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