just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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