Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
