So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
