Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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