WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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