I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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