i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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