On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
and you fell through a lawn chair
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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