at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
