What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize