she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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