ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
