We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize