real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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