I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
