I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize