After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
