this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
