we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize
