that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize