Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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