you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
