porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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