you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
