Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
