2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
