after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize