But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Four minutes until I can fart!
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Randomize