nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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