Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
