So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
