No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Operation Purity has been aborted
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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