Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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