thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
